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Sometimes, Jay Spring believes he is “the most exceptional individual alive”. Having received an NPD diagnosis, his grandiose moments frequently escalate into “really delusional”, he states. You feel invincible and you think, ‘The world will recognize that I surpass everyone else … I will achieve remarkable feats for the world’.”

Regarding his experience, these times of heightened ego are often followed by a “emotional downturn”, during which he feels deeply emotional and embarrassed about his conduct, making him especially susceptible to disapproval from external sources. He first suspected he might have this personality condition after investigating his behaviors on the internet – and subsequently diagnosed by a professional. Yet, he questions he would have taken the label without having independently formed that realization personally. “If you try to tell somebody that they have the condition, {they’ll probably deny it|denial is a common response|they’re likely to reject it,” he comments – especially if they harbor feelings of superiority. “They’re in a delusional world that they’ve built up. And within that framework, No one compares to me and {nobody can question me|no one should doubt me|my authority is absolute.”

Clarifying The Condition

Although people have been labelled as narcissists for more than a century, it’s not always clear what people refer to as the diagnosis. It’s common to label everybody a narcissist,” says a psychology professor, adding the word is “overused” – but when it comes to a clinical identification, he suggests many people hide it, as there is widespread prejudice around the illness. A narcissist will tend to have “an exaggerated self-image”, “impaired compassion”, and “a pattern of manipulating others to enhance their social status through actions such as displaying material goods,” the expert says. Those with NPD may be “deeply egotistical”, to the point that {“they’re not able to hold down stable relationships|“their jobs are damaged|“they have a distorted view of reality,” he states.

Emotional connections were never important about anyone really, so relationships weren’t a priority relationships seriously

Sex-Based Distinctions in Narcissism

Although up to 75% of people found to have narcissistic personality disorder are men, findings indicates this statistic does not mean there are fewer narcissistic women, but that narcissism in women is more often presented in the covert form, which is often overlooked. Narcissistic traits in men tends to be somewhat tolerated, just kind of like everything in society,” notes a young adult who posts about her co-occurring conditions on online channels. It’s fairly common, the two disorders appear together.

Individual Challenges

“I really struggle with handling criticism and rejection,” she says, since when I’m told that the issue lies with me, I often enter defence mode or I withdraw entirely.” Despite having this behavior – which is often called “narcissistic injury”, she has been working to manage it and take advice from her support system, as she strives not to return into the damaging patterns of her previous life. “I was very emotionally abusive to my partners as a teenager,” she states. Through dialectical behavioural therapy, she has been able to reduce her narcissistic traits, and she notes she and her significant other “have a dynamic where I told him, ‘If I say something messed up, if I say something manipulative, call it out {right then and there|immediately|in the moment’.”

Her upbringing mostly in the care of her father and explains there was an absence of supportive figures during development. It’s been a process of understanding all this time what is and is not appropriate to say during a fight because I never had that in my formative years,” she says. Every insult was fair game when my household were criticizing me when I was growing up.”

Underlying Factors of NPD

Conditions like NPD tend to be linked to childhood challenges. Genetics play a role,” explains a consultant psychiatrist. But, when someone shows signs of narcissism, it is often “tied to that specific childhood circumstances”. Those traits were “a coping mechanism in some ways to cope in formative years”, he adds, when they may have been neglected, or only shown love that was conditional on meeting certain expectations. They then “persist in applying those familiar tactics as adults”.

Like several of the those diagnosed, a person from Leeds thinks his parents “could also have the disorder. The individual explains when he was a child, “everything was all about them and their work and their social life. So it was like, keep your distance.” When their attention turned to him, it came in the form of “intense expectations to achieve academic success and career success, he notes, which made him feel that if he didn’t achieve their goals, he wasn’t “good enough”.

As he grew older, none of his relationships lasted. Emotional investment was lacking about anyone really,” he says. Therefore, I never treated relationships seriously.” He felt incapable of loving someone, until he met his current partner of three years, who is facing similar challenges, so, like him, finds it hard to manage mood stability. She is “highly empathetic of the thoughts that occur in my head”, he says – it was surprisingly, she who originally considered he might have NPD.

Pursuing Treatment

After a visit to his general practitioner, an assessment was arranged to a clinical psychologist for an assessment and was told his diagnosis. He has been referred for talking therapy through national services (a long period of therapy is the primary approach that has been demonstrated to benefit NPD patients, clinicians explain), but has been on the treatment delay for an extended period: It was indicated it is probably going to be in a few months.”

John has only told a small circle about his NPD diagnosis, because “prejudice is common that all narcissists are abusers”, but, privately, he has accepted it. This understanding allows me to comprehend my actions, which is always a good thing,” he explains. Each individual have come to terms with NPD and are seeking help for it – hence being willing to talk about it – which is possibly not the norm of all people with the diagnosis. But the presence of online advocates and the expansion of virtual networks indicate that {more narcissists|a growing number